. Hurts .
. Knowing .
. They will disappear .
. Dissolve like the rest .
. Always .
. Eventually .
. Dissolve .
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. Hurts .
. Knowing .
. They will disappear .
. Dissolve like the rest .
. Always .
. Eventually .
. Dissolve .
Attempting to process some unpleasant feelings towards some particular people in my life.
Sometimes I think it’s gone and am convinced I’m free, even if I know it’s just for a little while. “I’ve had a good week”, I say to myself, and I say to others, and I’m smiling.
Then there’ll be someone in the know…
Sometimes I feel a little envious of the people who have grown up developing close bonds with extended family members.
One day they won’t be here
One day they won’t stay anymore
2023 was the year of gratitude.
2024…
I crossed an ocean with equal parts anticipation and tension, fearful of the unknowns to a point that most would consider irrational, as is common for “my kind”.
I’m alone beside others who are not.
Looking down at cities, towns, and farmlands, they’re fragmented like glass shards by roads, railways, and edges of fields.
I think I figured out another good thing I get from doing budō. Efforts to create and maintain group harmony is actually helping me learn how to socialize better, and helping me connect with people. I think I saw some fruits of those efforts today. It was a really good feeling. Rewarding. Maybe I helped someone. Not sure I can really say that for sure, but I hope I did. A small aside — I love how some of my classmates tend to speak in metaphors, even when they may not mean to. Having people around from different parts of the world with different first languages lends itself to that, and it’s another way for me to broaden my way of thinking. I love it.
Is it the powerful communication, or sensory input, or both?