Fear moves through me.
Anger moves through me.
Each will pause for a time before moving along.
Each will always return.
When they move through me,
I must remember:
They visit;
I do not become.
When they return again,
I must remember:
They are smoke and wind.
They come to me.
I am neither.
December 16 – 18, 2025
I’ll take my fill from here, from the inside
I’ll take everything you consume away from you
Leaving you to starve
With a belly full of me
…
In the aftermath of the battle,
peace is woven with loose threads between embraces and kind words…
I hope he dies and she goes on to live the most amazing and fulfilling life.
There’s rarely fights
(We’re too solid for that, after all)
There’s just insidious malcontent
Morphing into anger first
And then, sometimes, madness
Turned inwards, burning from the inside out
…
Frothing at the mouth
Over prophesized outcomes
I’ll never prevent
Fury turned inward:
History deafens me while
Self-hate steals my sight
I’m angry as hell
At predicted ends because
I’m fucking mental
Damp heat in late spring:
Anger can’t last forever
Under smoke and ash
Memories of those I hate
Or hated
Still walk into the room some evenings
Looking, somehow, as shocked to see me
As I am angry to see them
…
…
Today I think about all the tenderness I felt
That they could just never hold on to
That I couldn’t place their fingers around
Not knowing if it was their failure
Or mine
…