Innate loneliness
Decision wants to be made
To stay or to go
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Innate loneliness
Decision wants to be made
To stay or to go
Wouldn’t it hurt far less
in the grand scheme of everything
if, instead…
For now, this place remains
Deep in my dreamscape
A fantasy to indulge…
Born some years ago
Today I celebrate him
Great friend and ally
Empty eyes staring
Why do they resist me still
So close to my shore
How is it that the feelings of others
Usually so obscure
Can at times be so much clearer
So much sharper around the edges
Than what’s inside my own core…
Rarely seen under the daytime sun
Appearing from time to time
Collecting energy enough to gleam…
Distant countenance
Calm façade yet further down
I can’t stop screaming
Finally finished
Mind and body spent, now
Exhausted and still
Ready to repeat
It all again tomorrow
If the sun will rise
Will I be tempered in the crucible
Of this cutting new awareness,
Maybe even sharpened to a razor’s edge?