It’s not really wanting to die so much as wanting to disappear.
Dying does take care of that, but maybe there’s other ways.
Today was a little clearer than usual.
The author and site owner can be reached at leeundercedartrees@gmail.com.
It’s not really wanting to die so much as wanting to disappear.
Dying does take care of that, but maybe there’s other ways.
Today was a little clearer than usual.
It just occurred to me today that tiredness and sadness feel (almost???) identical to me.
anything I have. I’m so damn tired.
Night rain on asphalt
Under the warm familiar roof
Friends talk over noise
I don’t understand people. I don’t always know why some things are ok but not other things. I get things wrong all the time that other people seem to just understand. Often I just don’t get it.
I can’t fix this ridiculous brain — I can only try to manage. But how do I manage this? I’m just going to keep making absolutely stupid mistakes. Others will keep wondering what the hell is wrong with me. It’ll happen again, and again, and again. I don’t know how to manage it.
Ki-ken-tai-ichi you take in through your eyes and your feet at the same time, feeling that floor rumble beneath you
Fumikomi declared with a strong foot decisively says “I am here, I am committed, harmonized, alive”
We symbolically kill, each death of them or us represents us climbing upward
I have a roommate that I wish would move away. But it won’t, so I have to learn to coexist with it.
This year was a bit of a fucking mess, honestly. Important but painful lessons were had.
Give yourself permission to be sad once in a while. It won’t kill you.
Just make it to next year. That part’s easy, right? I’m almost there! Please let me stay a little longer. Maybe I’ll find what I need. Just give me a little more time.
Eternity is a long time. Please stop rushing me. Eternity is patient. It can wait a few more months for me. It can wait a little longer. It can wait. It can wait. It can wait a little longer. I can wait a little longer. I can wait. I can wait. I can wait.