The other night as I drifted off to sleep
With tiny quiet dread, my heart whispered to me
A wicked truth newly discovered:
The author and site owner can be reached at leeundercedartrees@gmail.com.
I'm a middle-aged nobody breathing one day at a time in Ontario, Canada.
This tiny corner of the Internet is an outlet for unmasking random thoughts and creations surrounding life in general, adventures in budō, and any other topics that come to a ridiculous mind.
"Through journaling, your voice cannot go unheard."
The other night as I drifted off to sleep
With tiny quiet dread, my heart whispered to me
A wicked truth newly discovered:
Late night mind wanderings on how I’m a mistake, written late last night, forgotten, then found in the morning.
My existence
Is incorrect
Is a mistake
Is impossible to fix
Is a thorn in many sides
Is not supposed to be
Is not supposed to be
Is not
I’m not supposed to be here
I’m not supposed to be
I’m not supposed to
I’m not
February 12, 2025, apx. 11 p.m.
So many friends
Stunned to be somehow one of them
I find myself on guard
Having learned them to be ephemeral
Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly
Evaporating into the vapid hollow space
Where my love echoes, no longer heard
By any but me
February 12, 2025, 10:40 p.m.
Three footprints in snow
She listens intently for
Her teacher’s guidance
People say that doing the right thing is the most difficult
They also tell me I should stay
I’ve been doing my best
through this weakness
this deformity
you know and appreciate this
and you’ve been so good
so generous and patient
with these damaged goods
…
Carrying silence like it’s my birthright
…
In this stillness
I choose to imagine myself
…
Sunrise over snow
I take this day as my own
Powerful and true
I live on, needed,
this unshakable feeling
…
To be seen thoroughly, deeply
Is to be known and truly loved
With unmatched honesty
…