The savage and I are at odds again today.
But, today, I’m not pacifying it. I refuse to play by its rules.
I will not coddle it, cuddle it, kiss it on its forehead today.
Today I resist. I argue. I rail against its every move.
.
June 3, 2025
What is this pervasiveness?
What is this system of patterns
These loops both logical and non?
…
“It’s too much. Again. Again, you go too far!”
I hear it loud and clear.
“You are too much!”
I am too much,
But — too much for what? Too much for who?
…
(Stream of consciousness foolishness, as sleep begins creeping in.)
…
I need to write
I need to breathe deeply
I need to inhale your calm peace
So I can exhale all this fear in exchange
…
A friend a couple weeks ago helped me begin to think: “Rather than a defect causing difficulties, it’s a difference causing difficulties.”