I march on daily
Stubbornly refusing to yield
A rebel parade of one
…
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I march on daily
Stubbornly refusing to yield
A rebel parade of one
…
Sometimes I start doing relatively well for a time. Days, weeks, maybe I get some good months, even. I get the audacity to start thinking that I’m improving, that I’m figuring things out. But then something will always end up putting me back in my place and reminding me that I can’t figure out how to be a whole, normal person. This cycle will repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat and will not end for as long as I live. The responsible thing is to bow out for real, but I still just can’t do it. I’m stuck.
So much love given:
surely most will
find its way back home
Love is infinite:
it knows only the limits
our fear imposes
.
(I see how much love some others generate and share. I wish they’ll always see as much as possible come back to them.)
Kind words, patient pauses,
encouragement to shine
Handmade cards, cats on T-shirts,
specially chosen stones
Notes inked on pages in books of wisdom,
celebrating decades lived
Soft roomy sleepwear, fruit in baskets,
flowers to communicate care
Mirrors sharp yet somehow gentle,
encouragement to live
Immense communication wordless and not
echoes through the chambers of my heart,
reminding me what I am to others
.
June 26, 2025
Senseless fear, senseless fear,
Always waiting near;
Senseless fear, senseless fear,
Destroying what’s held dear.
Creeping fear, creeping fear,
Robbing me of sleep;
Creeping fear, creeping fear,
Crawling in so deep.
Silent fear, silent fear,
Fraying threads so thin;
Silent fear, silent fear,
I fear the day you win.
.
June 25, 2025, late; June 26 edits
No trickles today
No regrets, few fears
The only tremors, slight as they were, the daily quivering from roots that anchor me to the rhythm of my own heartbeat
Shouldn’t be surprised
Uninterrupted sleep tonight
Is too much to ask
2 a.m.
Let instinct guide you
Take my hand in yours
Take my lines in your palms
Wrap yours in mine
I lie fallow
Waiting…
Wake! Wake up!
It screams.
Hear me! Get up!
It whistles.
…
This marriage of elements simply lives a short, furious existence, however it pleases, until exhaustion.
Pale-faced like the ticking round clock on the wall.