Through Self-Imposed Dark

I thought I just wanted
No, needed
Another to see who
Or what
I really am
To hear my truth 

I think I’m starting to realize
It’s not just about being seen
But through others
There’s a hope
I might finally figure it out
I might solve this obfuscated
Riddle of me

Am I really looking so hard
For myself
Among this jumbled, tangled mess
Of other people I’ve absorbed
Out of a need for discovery

Or is it

Born of a need
For something else 

A need for a confirmation
That I’m not so out of place 

A need to hear some kind of truth
And see how much light
Can really be found here
Buried behind heavy doors  

Terrified at the thought
I still close my ears
I still cover my eyes
But ever so slowly
Ever so carefully
I continue somehow fumbling
Forward
Through this self-imposed
Dark 

March 21, 2025