How is it that the feelings of others
Usually so obscure
Can at times be so much clearer
So much sharper around the edges
Than what’s inside my own core…
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How is it that the feelings of others
Usually so obscure
Can at times be so much clearer
So much sharper around the edges
Than what’s inside my own core…
Rarely seen under the daytime sun
Appearing from time to time
Collecting energy enough to gleam…
Some night last week, I had a dream that I can very vaguely remember just a tiny bit of. I dreamed that I admitted myself to a mental health care institution of some sort.
… With many computers… and cats.
I feel like there’s something I’m not willing to admit to myself
But I keep getting closer to uncovering it
I feel like I need to. It’s part of the process. But I’m afraid it’s going to hurt
Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s something, but not such a big deal. Maybe it’s not very painful at all. Maybe I’m overreacting to a minor discomfort. Maybe it’s something absolutely horrible, something I will hate myself for.
Distant countenance
Calm façade yet further down
I can’t stop screaming
Finally finished
Mind and body spent, now
Exhausted and still
Ready to repeat
It all again tomorrow
If the sun will rise
Will I be tempered in the crucible
Of this cutting new awareness,
Maybe even sharpened to a razor’s edge?
May they serve to remind my future self of the importance of perseverance, of how quickly things can change, and the value in maintaining good human connections with the right people.